I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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