so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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