She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
