Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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