Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
