This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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