I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
