I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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