Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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