This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Sex in the backyard? Check.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
