Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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