The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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