I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
