The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
