Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
