Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
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this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
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FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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