found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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