my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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