Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
