So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Randomize
