She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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