I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
