butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
