I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize