so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
