would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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