..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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