Your dad touched me again.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
