Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
