I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
