I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
