tell your sister to shave her snatch
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
