He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
