I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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