Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize