Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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