Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.