Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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