Buhtt sex?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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