shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your dick twin last night
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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