In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize