she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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