and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize