my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
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