Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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