google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
