well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
why is half of my head shaved?
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