Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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