i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize