Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
