i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
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He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
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Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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