I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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